1. I would forget flowers and things and all women would hate me.
2. I would be a misogynist.
3. I would be like Henry Higgins.
4. I would be five inches taller with broader shoulders so all the guys would be jealous of me.
5. THEREFORE...I wouldn't have any friends.
6. I might have to live in Red Hill (ick).
7. My brother would have killed me by now.
8. I couldn't be a feminist without being weird.
9. I couldn't listen to Sinead O'Connor without being really weird.
10. I couldn't wear red scarves and flared pants without being gay.
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